For Today...Monday, June 1, 2015 (which happens to be National Cancer Survivors Day)
What a wonderful day, June 1. Summer! And a shout out to Aunt Anne, Amy, Doris, Grammie Ruthie C., Grandma Dorothy, Emerson, and all the other amazing friends and family members who have managed to kick cancer's ass so far!
Outside my window...
Birds are singing their individual, melodic songs. Jackie's love for birds (and all things sound, really) is giving me a new love for the sounds around us in nature, and specifically, a desire to learn more bird calls.
I am thinking...
About what is really important in a marriage. I have been thinking about this all year (decade, lifetime...). For me, the most important things are: that the two people mutually share love, communication (especially verbal, but also affection and acts of service), sex, and the willingness to resolve conflict together. And loving Christmas can't hurt either. I just added that last one in there for fun.
I am thankful...
For a loving family - my first family of Mom, Dad, Lauren; my very loving and accepting extended family, whom I miss terribly on a pretty much continual basis; and my created family of friends and of the "family unit," being Scott, Lucinda Grace, and Jack Lawrence. Though all of them challenge me in a thousand ways daily, they also make me a much better, stronger, more loving and compassionate person, and they all bless me with endless unconditional grace. Thank you for being mine and I will try to be my best for you.
I am wearing...
my favorite purple shirt. Periwinkle. What a great color.
I am creating...
a manuscript of poetry, mostly new writings from this past year (some of my best, I think), that I would very much like to read publicly soon, like in Mom's circle, and that I hope to turn into a book, possibly titled, "Hard-Won Truths: Poetry on Love and Life."
I am going...
to Washington D.C. in a couple of weeks on union business - my first trip away alone without the kids - and I am excited. Have nothing, absolutely nothing, to wear. Hope to fit in time for a museum or two. Haven't been to Washington since I was a teenager, and a lot has happened there since then. Would love to go with a history buff, or with a week's time to meander in my favorite style of exploration (museums, churches, monuments, tour the White House, great restaurants and music, ride the bus all over the place, that sort of thing). But this will be a short trip, and I will be traveling with work friends (=basically strangers). So I am keeping expectations low, will be thrilled with anything, and am hoping very much the hotel has a pool! Yeehaw!
I am wondering...
how to create the type of family and life I want to have, as it does not seem to fit in the traditional mold, and almost none of the models shown to me seems quite right for me and Scott. I am wondering if God's grace is big enough to make a new path for us. I believe it is. But apparently grace does not equal easy or straightforward. I suppose that is okay (and fitting).
I am reading...
The Five Love Languages again. I am learning a lot about things I could have (should have?) done differently in the past and trying to learn as much as I can for the future. I think my love language is "words of affirmation" closely followed by "physical touch." Regardless of your relationship status, I would recommend this book because it is highly insightful and helpful in understanding yourself and the others with whom you live, work, and play. I remembered it as being more religious and preachy than it actually is - a nice realization that I can read it again with no personal hindrances.
I am hoping...
to visit my friends one of these years: Rebecca and Andrew, Kate, Amy, Juli Squires, Beth/Doris/Kelly in CA, Davy J in NYC, Robin in Canada, Prudence, and all the other old, tried and true friends whom my heart longs for with enormous weight.
I am learning...
how to honor time for myself, how to protect and cherish it - that quiet, that stillness, or that blessed exercise, whatever - even if it sometimes makes me lonely because once I spend time with myself, there is no more time left for friends. It is just.so.important. Healing and energizing. And VITAL for figuring out the thorny decisions I am facing and honoring the suffering and joys that are happening amidst everything else.
In my garden...
is nothing. I asked Irv to build me a raised garden bed/trough for our porch, so I could garden with Lucinda (and Jack). Then I got overwhelmed with every other effing project that needs doing and told him to hold off. Now I am waffling back the other way and thinking how nice it would be to have something living, growing - like fresh lettuce, carrots, tomatoes, herbs, and cucumbers. Honestly, I have no idea how to garden. I remember years playing in my mother's garden in Brookfield. It was so beautiful, so organized, so full of life (and worms)! Someday. Truly, someday...
In my kitchen...
are several groceries to make several delicious, home-cooked meals and it's been too stinking hot to turn on the oven or stove to make any of them. My little daughter loves to help me cook, and we really enjoy making muffins and cookies together, or quiche, or soup. All of which I have the ingredients for...maybe this afternoon, as it is cool and rainy today...
A favorite quote for today...
A peek into one of my days...
[nobody wants to see that kind of crazy. I live with toddlers. 'nuff said.]
One of my favorite things...
is writing alone in a coffee shop for hours, while drinking a delicious coffee or mocha or cappuccino. Even better, doing this with a friend who enjoys the silence too for reading or writing, and every once in a while, coming out with something you just have to share, then back to your book...deeeeelightful. (Miss you, Kate, and Juli.)
Post Script
(this amused me this morning...)
(hahaha)
Love, Ally
