SWDB: This Thursday in June

The Simple Woman's Daybook

June 14, 2012
Outside My Window...the sun is shining through the leafy trees. It is summertime in New Hampshire.

I am thankful for...my darling daughter Lucy, who is growing in leaps and bounds, faster than I can keep up with her, and who is stretching my heart every day. She is easy to love, easy to marvel at, easy to forgive. Lucinda will turn one in a few short weeks. How is that even possible?

I am thinking...about how to reconstruct the pieces of my life that have fallen into disarray. I read on a bumper sticker this week, "The problems we face cannot be fixed by the minds that created them." This is not good news, if it's true!

From the kitchen...Lucinda can see the back yard during her baths in the kitchen sink. She has decided to love her baths again, for which I am endlessly thankful, as they are so fun again. She has two rubber duckies who join her, and another yellow plastic toy that pours water out. She sits in that "tub" next to the huge pile of dishes stacked in the dish drainer and is just every bit a part of our every day life. Reminds me of my baths in the sink with my cousin at Bass Lake as a kid.

I am creating...a Thank You project for me and the husband to do on a daily basis, as we are both feeling underappreciated and undercherished at the moment. gotta remedy that. [hmm, I am going to leave that answer in there from April...as I never did it and we are still feeling this way. goal: complete this project.]

I am reading... absolutely nothing right now. Who has time to read? I am a mother who gets no sleep! OK, well I am occasionally reading from "If the Buddha Married," which is a very good and insightful book but kind of aggravates me because the Buddha WAS married when he up and left his wife and child for his spiritual quest and never came back (as far as I know). So it's a little hard to take marriage advice from that guy...

I am hoping... to see the mother bear again in our yard. I guess I shouldn't be hoping for that, but I long to see her and feel her presence and I find myself looking for her both day and night. "Am I not with you, I who am your mother?" ~ Virgin of Guadalupe

I am hearing...messages in the stars lately. The Big Dipper and The Summer Triangle have been quite comforting.

I am wearing...the one pair of shoes I could afford this year, b/c I bought them with a gift card of Scott's from Christmas. Am not loving the extreme limitations of this half-an-income thing. It is harder and more trying than I thought.

Around the house...progress is being made, one tiny corner at a time. We have never had such a hard time unpacking or settling into a house, but then again, we never had a baby before (together). Scott's mom is coming to visit soon, so that mere fact will likely jump start the mad cleaning and organizing into gear. 

I am going...to attend a yoga in the park event next Saturday (hopefully) in Henniker. The thought of doing group yoga, outside, is very appealing. I have been trying to start meditating again, and doing yoga on a regular basis. I need some serious centering and balancing right now.

One of my favorite things...is going back to bed on weekend mornings, because my husband is great about taking over with Babykins so I can catch up on a little sleep. She is up several times a night these days, and we are failing miserably according to the sleep training methods, but such is what it is and we love her and this will not last forever. But crawling into bed and pulling the blankets over my head while I know the two of them are fine and having fun is sweet, sweet bliss. Thank you, Scott.

A few plans for the rest of the week...are visiting with two dear friends in Vermont this weekend who are needing some love and laughter these days. And celebrating Father's Day in whatever manner Daddy sees fit.

Here is picture thought I am sharing...

 Lucy in Mama's hat from when she was a baby. photo by Scott Snyder.

 

Lucy playing in the sandbox at her wonderful baby sitter's house this summer. photo by Jenn Dennis.

I've been missing my Dad terribly lately. Needing him. I love this picture, waving from the bottom of the world's largest pyramid in Mexico (I was on my way to the top)...

feels like he is still waving from where he is now.

 

Dad in Mexico, on a wonderful trip with us the year he died. Love you.

View other entries at The Simple Woman's Daybook. And write your own!

~Ally

I love this so much today:

"Awake to stiffness, awake to ease. Awake to boundless joy, awake to the deep well of sorrow. Awake to fear, awake to spaciousness. Just awakeness; this is your home."

~ Margaret Fletcher, amazing and insightful teacher at White Mountain Sangha

Let Evening Come

by Jane Kenyon

Let the light of late afternoon
shine through chinks in the barn, moving
up the bales as the sun moves down.

Let the cricket take up chafing
as a woman takes up her needles
and her yarn. Let evening come.

Let dew collect on the hoe abandoned
in long grass. Let the stars appear
and the moon disclose her silver horn.

Let the fox go back to its sandy den.
Let the wind die down. Let the shed
go black inside. Let evening come.

To the bottle in the ditch, to the scoop
in the oats, to air in the lung
let evening come.

Let it come, as it will, and don't
be afraid. God does not leave us
comfortless, so let evening come. 




____
I think I would like to illustrate this into a children's goodnight book. Must get out the paints. ~Ally

Grateful for

1. Time with Laurel, Mom, and Lucinda tomorrow. Laurel is having a party to sell stuff and we are happily attending!
2. Boston being so close by.
3. The feeling after sweeping the disgusting bathroom floor. A clean floor is a wonderful thing.
4. Had a good long walk today. It was sunny and there was a cool, gentle breeze blowing. A good Spring day.
5. I have a lettuce plant (!) that my friend gave me for Easter and I can't wait to put it in my garden and grow some more lettuce. It is actually thrilling to have lettuce growing in a pot in my kitchen!
6. A brand new spider plant that is lush and thriving, from friends as a gift today. I got rid of most of my plants when we moved and/or this winter in general, and now we have a new house, full of sun, and a big yard. I am super excited to start fresh.
7. Little Girl is learning to crawl. I better get on that child-proofing project...
8. Changes underway in my spirit and heart.
9. Spring fever. I think it is going to lead me to a new and hopefully much better haircut.
10. The ever-growing idea that time and space heals a lot. And that change is inevitable and eternal - it can upset as well as comfort us, and I know I can count on it.

~Ally

Poems for Sunday

I swear the earth shall surely be complete to him or
her who shall be complete,
The earth remains jagged and broken only to him
or her who remains jagged and broken.

I swear there is no greatness or power that does not
emulate those of the earth,
There can be no theory of any account unless it
corroborate the theory of the earth,
No politics, song, religion, behavior, or what not,
is of account, unless it compare with the
amplitude of the earth,
Unless it face the exactness, vitality, impartiality,
rectitude of the earth.

~Walt Whitman


---

To live content with small means,
to seek elegance rather than luxury,
and refinement rather than fashion,
to be worthy, not respectable, and wealthy, not rich,
to study hard, think quietly, talk gently, act frankly,
to listen to stars and birds, babes and sages, with open heart,
to bear all cheerfully,
do all bravely,
await occasions,
hurry never--
in a word, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious,
grow up through the common.
This is to be my symphony.

~William Ellery Channing

Simple Woman's Day Book

The Simple Woman's Daybook

April 5, 2012

Outside My Window...it is cloudy and chilly, the perfect weather for Maundy Thursday.

I am thinking...how there must be so many lonely mothers who have decided to stay home with their kids to raise them, but are desperate for some adult human interaction, especially in the late winding hours of afternoon.

I am thankful for...my parents having stayed together all those years, because even though I don't know how to do it, i know it can be done, and that gives me hope.

From the kitchen...i should be making some banana bread to thank that lovely mom in town who gave me a bunch of leftover baby food jars and diapers, via our new babysitter.

I am wearing...a bizarre, somewhat mismatched outfit. maybe today is the day to get my clothes unpacked finally and sorted out. oh, but a nap seems like a better choice...

I am creating...a Thank You project for me and the husband to do on a daily basis, as we are both feeling underappreciated and undercherished at the moment. gotta remedy that.

I am going...to try and join the local Zumba class on thursday nights. i really want to meet people, and do something active and fun. my hearts needs this.

I am reading... Joshua: A Parable for Today by Joseph Girzone.

I am hoping...to revive our family happiness in this new town and new house. already scott seems much happier here than in our previous home. but miracles take time and i am hoping that bit by bit, we will both come to a place of joy and contentment.

I am hearing...my father in my head a lot lately. he always seems to be sending me messages and for the most part, they are less judgy and more gentle than when he was here on earth. my view of life after death changed somewhat while reading a silly novel called "Saving Fish From Drowning," and i now always think of my father as possessing divine all-knowingness in his new status, whatever it may be. it has helped our "relationship."

Around the house...is one chaotic pile of mess after another. we moved about two weeks ago and i had work conferences going on at the same time. we have barely had a chance to stop and breathe. we have a LOT of work to do to get this house feeling like home!

One of my favorite things...is regular old day-to-day life with laurel, and i got a slice of that heaven last saturday when she came to visit overnight with the boys. i just wish we lived in the same town. i really need that daily-ness for the health of my soul. it fills me up so beautifully.

A few plans for the rest of the week...are continuing to prep for my next upcoming conference at work, and then unpacking and family time - hopefully a little bonding - and then some friendly socializing over Easter dinner at mom's with some of her/our friends. lucy does love her some partying.

Here is picture thought I am sharing...

Miss Nine Months Old, as photographed by Daddy, Scott Snyder, this morning.

And tomorrow is the full moon...
View other entries at The Simple Woman's Daybook. And write your own!

~Ally

beautiful Jane Kenyon

After an Illness, Walking the Dog
by Jane Kenyon

Wet things smell stronger,
and I suppose his main regret is that
he can sniff just one at a time.
In a frenzy of delight
he runs way up the sandy road—
scored by freshets after five days
of rain. Every pebble gleams, every leaf.

When I whistle he halts abruptly
and steps in a circle,
swings his extravagant tail.
The he rolls and rubs his muzzle
in a particular place, while the drizzle
falls without cease, and Queen Anne’s lace
and Goldenrod bend low.

The top of the logging road stands open
and light. Another day, before
hunting starts, we’ll see how far it goes,
leaving word first at home.
The footing is ambiguous.

Soaked and muddy, the dog drops,
panting, and looks up with what amounts
to a grin. It’s so good to be uphill with him,
nicely winded, and looking down on the pond.

A sound commences in my left ear
like the sound of the sea in a shell;
a downward, vertiginous drag comes with it.
Time to head home. I wait
until we’re nearly out to the main road
to put him back on the leash, and he
—the designated optimist—
imagines to the end that he is free.

borrowed from today's Gwarlingo: http://www.gwarlingo.com/2012/the-sunday-poem-jane-kenyon/

(such a lovely blog post dedicated to Jane Kenyon today. and i dedicate this reposting of it to Barb Bald. xo)

another one you might like: http://astherabbithole.blogspot.com/2011/07/100-times-beginner-status-thoughts-on.html