At the poetry reading the other night, a woman said to me she hasn't had time to write as she's been too busy, hasn't had the time to quiet down. I know what she means. We live at such a hectic pace, always in motion, trying to jam seventeen things in every short minute, often wishing we could have done more. I am finding some quiet finally. I am rather happy.
Until now, I haven't had much to say since my job was eliminated and I found myself flung into an unexpected life situation. I worked on polishing up my resume, finding a new job, making the right calls and not making the wrong ones. One day a connection with a job lead, the next, a long-overdue lunch with mom. Then reading a poem - in public - to spice things up. (The audience was kind, by the way, and the poem was well received. Thanks for your encouragement!)
But today as I sat in the car and at a red light, I found myself hurriedly jotting down posts I want to write. On quiet spaces, moments of wonder (to come), and topics yet to be revealed. I am quieting down. I learn to segment and gently protect my days. Finally at the end of last week, I said "no" to an invite: I need some time for me, to breathe, find out what's happened to me, see where we're headed next.
As the noise of busyness slips away, these are some quiet things I have had the luxury of enjoying:
1) Tending my plants. I pour over them daily now, watching the minuscule progress. A blue ceramic pot holds wonderful yellow marigolds. Rain grew the leaves tall, almost hiding the three flowers among green. Two new buds promise more color. I can't wait.
2) Cooking for Laurel. She has had the baby (gorgeous Gabriel) and is recovering. In a new home (we moved them last Saturday), she rests. I envision myself in an Italian kitchen...I crank up the oven each day and make a huge mess (of love) and I will bring her piles of food soon (casseroles, frozen meals, easy to prepare and wolf down without hassling). Food is love where I come from.
3) Missing Robin. She's gone to England for several weeks and I feel the lack of her presence. I hope the next few are happy days for her, making good memories to soothe her heart from recent trials. She deserves a break.
4) Taking care of my body. Went to the chiro today. Reminded me how much I need a massage. Trying to tend this body of mine, remember its fibromyalgia, be a little kinder and gentler. That said, also hoping to lose some weight in my new life without work, eating out and comforting myself with food after hard days at the office. I have time to walk, stretch, and move now. Want to use the time well.
5) Sleep. Sometimes you just need to catch up. And it is good.
Are you finding any quiet spaces (inside or out)?
~Allison
